FUNNY

Two things: It's funny how I have so much more time to blog now that I have a job.....

and speaking of jobs - here's a funny about them....

But first - if you didn't pet the tiger, you can go home now. LOL




HOW TO POOP AT WORK:

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORKPOOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.

CROP DUSTING:When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.

FLY BY:This is the act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and Check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and Come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

ESCAPEE:This is a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or Forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is Uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK:When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not Panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare Everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.